LEARNING TO LIVE

It was time for the summer vacations. One fine morning, reading through the newspaper, I came across an advertisement regarding ‘Summer Adventure Camps’ with a tag line underneath, “Gift your child the 3 C’s to last a lifetime – Courage, Confidence & Character’. The very moment it occurred to me, this is what I am looking for! Now the problem was to make my parents agree to send me for one. I called at the number given in the advertisement and told them about my desire to be on the camp. They took my address and contact details and said that they would send across the details soon.

Next morning, I had just had breakfast and gone back to my room that mom shouted, “Karan, come downstairs!” I could sense that something must be terribly wrong but could not make out what. I could see through the grill of the staircase that someone was sitting next to mom waiting for me perhaps. The moment I reached downstairs, mom said, “Did you call them regarding the summer camp?” I responded nervously, “Yes m… ma…… mama.” Mom looked towards the gentleman and said, “See, he cannot even respond properly to the query he made. You really think he would be able to go for the camp?” The gentleman responded, “Madam, give us a chance to serve you. I assure you that he would be a different boy once he returns. To make you aware of the things we do, I will take you through a brief presentation if you so permit.” Mom nodded and the gentleman opened his laptop and played a video. After watching the video, mom asked me if I wanted to go. I said, “Yes.” In the meantime, my father arrived as well and after listening to the entire conversation he said, “Let him go if he wants. You cannot keep him tied to you all the time. He needs to learn how to be independent.” He asked the gentleman about the formalities, filled the form, paid the charges and went to his room. The gentleman got up and walked towards the door to leave. At the door he turned back and said, “Karan! See you at the camp.” He smiled and left. As soon as the door closed, I jumped in excitement, “Yesss!”.

A week later it was time to leave for the camp. I packed my stuff as per the list given by the organizers and waited for the pick-up van to come. Mom was telling me what to do and what not to, what all she had kept for me to eat, to wear etc. The car came and when I was about to leave I told my mother, “Mamma, don’t worry, I will be fine.” I could see the love through the tears in my mother’s eyes as this was the first time I was going somewhere on my own and believe me, I was scared.

We reached the camp site after a 3 hours drive from Chandigarh. There were around 40 children along with me at the camp. Our instructors briefed us the moment we reached about what to do around and what not to. After an introductory session we were taught how to pitch tents and divided into groups for the activities. I was excited but nervous too. The fear within of being alone and away from home was catching up on me. To my bad luck, the same person who visited my place and was one of our instructors sensed that out and told me that I will be leading my group during the activities, the first of which was a night trek in the woods. I felt like running away form the site, back to home, onto my bed and cover myself up as if I would not be visible to anyone. Just as we were about to begin the same instructor called me and said to me holding me by my hand, “Look, we all have some hidden fears but to move ahead in life, we need to overcome them. The same place where we roam around freely during day scares us as it gets dark because we fear darkness as we cannot see things around. We fear the unknown. It is your perception of things that makes you afraid. We all have two options in life, either to fear from our fears or to make them fear us.”

I was wondering what he told me but now it was a question of ego that how could someone think that I cannot do something! I started leading my group into the woods and suddenly I heard another child scream. I started to shiver. I was actually scared now. Our instructors told us to stand still and not to make noise. After a while they led us back to the camp site. After dinner, I walked down to the instructor who had told me what I mentioned above and asked him if I could talk. He said, “Yes, of course.” I asked him what happened in the woods. He calmly responded that there were just some wild animals around. I shouted, “What? Wild animals!” He could sense from my voice that I was terrified at the very thought. He said, “Karan, I told you earlier. Do not fear things because its these inherent fears that would never let you grow up in life. If you fear something, you would hesitate to do it. This hesitation would soon make you avoid things and you would start loosing your self-confidence and at the end you would realize that I have been nothing but a loser.” I told him that this was the first time I was out from home, away from my parents and how scared I was. He said, “All I want you to do is to keep in mind what I have told you and do the activities with courage even if you fear some.” I said yes though I was not sure if I would be able to do all that I had seen in the video.

The activities began and I could see the myriad expressions on the faces of the children while doing the activities and soon it was my turn. I looked towards my instructor. I thought that he is right It is going to be now, or never. While coming down the rock, I could feel the butterflies in my stomach and the shivering of my hands but I soon realized midway that they were gone! I then did all the other activities during the remaining three days of the camp and I do not remember looking back towards the instructor even once. At the end of the camp, I could not control myself and went and touched the feet of my instructor. He hugged me and said, “Always remember what you have learned and never forget that fears are your own creation.”

On reaching back home I told my mother and father of all the things that I did and the friends I made and what I learned. I was visibly excited. Father told mother, “He seems to have grown up in 4 days!” I walked towards dad, held his hand and said, “No Papa, I have just learnt how to face myself.” Mom and dad hugged me and said, “That’s our boy”.

What I wondered to be my bad luck once, ironically, turned out to be the best I could ever come across.